Submit Your Writer Bios!

If you're a writer of any stripe, you've probably written a writer bio before. Be it in the ten minutes leading up to a publication's submission deadline, or one day while daydreaming about your future J.K. Rowling-sized riches, it's not a part of writing that is easy to avoid. Nevertheless, you've probably found that it's impossible to produce one that is totally, entirely satisfying, one that gives the editors, and, hopefully, the readers, a sense of just how all-encompassingly awesome you are. Given how short they are, the temptation can be to just keep on writing and writing them until you come upon that rarest and most sought-after of creatures: the least-worst bio. That one you submit to a magazine, or a journal, or a reading series' curators. This blog is for the other ones.

Submit your absurd/rude/childish bios—the embarrassingly honest and the hilariously untrue. alex.manley@gmail.com

Do it. For science.

Stéphanie Thomas is an accident prone person, especially involving vehicles (sometimes new) that do not belong to her. Her favorite own stories involves a beaver, a squirrel, and Miss Katherine. Oh, and she wants to make a career out of being the letter A.

Alex Manley has recently discovered this thing called, uh, "coffee," I guess? Have you heard of this shit? It's crazy! Wow. Y'all should get on this shit.

Jessica Rose Marcotte is an often high-pitched noise designed to alert large groups of people to potential danger or the need for urgent action in some form or another. These devices are often used on the tops of emergency service vehicles such as police cars or ambulances, or can also be stationary, such as in the case of those used to alert office buildings or schools to fires. Related topics: The Doppler effect.

Jessica Rose Marcotte was born in Montreal and is thinking of tossing the whole writing thing and going into science instead. She is not bluffing.

Jillian Boyd is an American and a poet. So like both yanks and poets, she lies. She's published 34 tomes of iambic pentameter. But it's hard to get a hold of, being so long it had to be printed 300 years in the future.

guillaume morissette is four people. he is the author of 0 poetry collection, 0 short story collection, 0 novel and 0 memoir. he writes poetry and fiction and emails. his work has appeared in lickety split, synapse, papirmasse and other places also.

he lives in montreal.